Through all of 2016 I never thought I would say those words. After
my ectopic pregnancy in September 2015, my body would not go back to normal. My
cycles became long and irregular, and all I wanted was to fill the void of
losing our first baby. My heart hurt, and I just knew we were going to have a hard
time getting pregnant again.
I went to a naturopath to see if I could “fix” my body the
natural way. I started a vitamin regimen that I was excited about, and I had
hope. Months went by, and I didn’t see any improvement in my cycles. After a lot of research, I started fertility acupuncture, Chinese medicine, and made some
major diet changes. Again, months went by and my body wasn’t responding to
anything. It was on its own schedule and nothing I did seemed to matter. I was so
frustrated! How am I supposed to get pregnant, when I am not ovulating
regularly and only have one fallopian tube? I decided to stop everything! No
more vitamins, no more gross herbs, and no more acupuncture needles. I wanted
to give my body a break. Maybe that was all it needed.
It was now September 2016, and I decided to go to my family
doctor to do some medical investigation. With blood work and an exploratory
ultrasound, I was given the news that, deep down, I already knew. I wasn’t
ovulating on my left side. My right ovary was the only ovary ovulating, and
that is my tubeless side. I was heartbroken. I was told the day I lost one of
my tubes, that there is still a small chance my left tube can pick up the egg
from the right ovary, but it doesn’t happen often.
I had been patient, and I didn’t want to wait anymore.
Anders and I made the decision to start fertility treatment. My family doctor
put our referral in, and we waited for the phone call. I knew it could take
months to get in. We had a trip to New York coming up so I had that to
distract me and look forward to while we waited. I remember the day the fertility clinic called. I was
sitting at the table with my mom when my phone rang, and when I hung up, I just bawled! This was it!!! We had our first fertility appointment
scheduled for January 16th, 2017. I was so excited; I could finally
get some help! It was still October and I knew I had a few more months to wait,
but just knowing we had a date made everything better. I relaxed for the first
time that year.
It was Christmas Eve morning, my period was a day late, and
I knew I had ovulated two weeks before (a miracle in itself!). This was our
last chance to get pregnant on our own before starting fertility drugs the
following month. I believe in a very gracious and miraculous God, and I know
that He can do wonders. Anders was still sleeping, I went to the bathroom, and
pulled out a pregnancy test. As much as you can prepare yourself to see a
negative result, and I had seen a TON over the last 16 months, it still sucks,
and hurts so much! I didn’t think I was pregnant at all, but I decided to take
it anyway even if that meant feeling sad around Christmas. Usually when I take
a test, I wait the 3 min to look at it, but this time, I couldn’t put it down.
I stared at it as I saw the pink lines start to form. LINES!! What?? There
were two! That second pink line came up so fast and strong, I couldn’t believe
it!!! I put it down and cried! I was
pregnant!!! After so long, after all the trials we had been through, my prayers
had been answered. I managed to contain my excitement and let Anders sleep in a
bit. I went into our living room and just sat there, in shock, praying, and thanking
God for this amazing Christmas miracle.
Anders joined me on the couch a little while later and, with
his birthday being Christmas day, I wanted to give him the positive test as an
early birthday present. He was being so stubborn as he insisted he wait until tomorrow.
Obviously, I couldn’t wait a whole day to tell him, so I just pulled out the
positive pregnancy test and showed it to him. He was definitely in as much
shock as me! We were so happy! We told my parents Christmas morning (how perfect!) and
then headed to Banff for our 23rd Christmas at the Rimrock Resort to
relax and celebrate. Best Christmas ever!!
When we got home a few days later, I knew I had to go to the
doctor. Due to my previous ectopic, I am considered to have a high-risk
pregnancy until the baby is found in the correct location. I had to have my
blood drawn every two days to make sure my pregnancy hormone levels were increasing appropriately.
It was New Years Eve when I went to the lab to get the last
of my three blood tests done. That afternoon Anders and I were out with a
friend. The first trimester fatigue was starting to hit me, so I decided to sit
in the car. As I was sitting there, I started feeling some cramping in my
uterus. I didn’t think much of it, but I wasn’t feeling great, so I texted
Anders and told him I was going home to sleep for a bit. As soon as I got home,
I went to the bathroom, and had spotting. No, no, no!! All the emotions of my
first pregnancy flooded in! I was 5 weeks when I started spotting with my
ectopic, and I was exactly 5 weeks by this time as well. How could this be? Everything
seemed so different with this pregnancy. I was already having symptoms; my
pregnancy tests were darker than they were with my ectopic. What was going on? I
called Anders immediately then I drove to my parent’s house to drop Bear off.
Anders met me there and we went straight to emergency. I prayed the
whole time; I didn’t want to lose this baby! I couldn’t imagine going through
another miscarriage. Once we got in, the doctor gave me my HCG (pregnancy
hormone) results from all my blood tests. My numbers were high and increasing
perfectly! What a relief! He then pulled out the bedside ultrasound machine to
look for the gestational sac in my uterus. As soon as he put the ultrasound on
me, I could see a tiny little sac in my uterus! I was ecstatic! That gave me peace of mind, knowing the baby wasn’t in my remaining fallopian tube. The doctor couldn’t see the fetal
pole so he wanted to send me for a thorough ultrasound before releasing me. During that ultrasound, we were able to see the
beginning stages of our baby measuring 2 days ahead! Our sweet baby! Out of curiosity, I asked the ultrasound tech if he could tell me which side I ovulated from. He said
the corpus luteum (cyst that occurs on the ovary after ovulation) was on my
right side. WHAT?! If this baby wasn’t already a miracle to us, then it sure was now!! My left fallopian tube swooped the egg from my right ovary! Our bodies
are so amazing! We finally got back to my parents house at 11pm, an hour before
the countdown, where we celebrated this amazing miracle, and rang in the New
Year with so much hope and joy!
Today, I am just over 14 weeks pregnant! We were able to see the heartbeat on our second ultrasound which just so happened to be the day we were supposed to start fertility treatment, January 16th. My heart had never felt so full! We had our 12 week ultrasound a few weeks ago, where it was confirmed through blood work and measurements, that baby is healthy, and strong! We are over the moon excited to meet this sweet baby in 6 short months!
Words can’t describe how happy I am, and how much I love this little one! I don’t understand why we go through the things we do in life, but I do know that everything happens in His perfect timing. This is the baby we are supposed to have. I won't ever forget the emotions, struggle and heartbreak we went through after losing our first baby, but it all seems better now.
Thanks so much for reading!
Xo,
Alexandra
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